Stationary patrol?

Yes, yes, I know you all miss the esteemed and always-entertaining Rick Lee. Forgive my invasive posting on his blog while he’s recovering at home (and, I believe, unable to have a drop of beer while he convalesces).

But I came across a phrase in an affidavit of probable cause this week, and I just had to share. In the narrative section, the officer starts off by explaining that he was “performing a stationary patrol.”

Um, that’s an oxymoron. And to me, a layman (though veteran cop reporter), that just sounds like he was hangin’ out in his cruiser, swilling a late-night cup of coffee and hopin’ nothing happened.

However, the next few sentences make it seem as though he was on a stakeout — either that, or he truly happened to be in the right place at the right time to snag a fugitive.

So help me out, legal and police community: Is “stationary patrol” an actual thing? Or is it a euphemism for a coffee break?

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