Growing up and moving on — but not far

Posted on October 9, 2011 by Amy Gulli

It’s been almost five years since I started this blog.

Samantha has been potty-trained, started school and whizzed through first and second grades. Noah has been — well, born, for starters.

Thank you for sharing our journey.

But, as my mom said to me and as I’ve repeated to my kids — which annoys them, but I do it anyway — the only thing constant in life is change. (We’ll leave out the death and taxes thing until they’re older.)

Because I’m the Mommy as a solo blog is ending.

Wait, wait, stop crying! There’s some good news.

Instead, I will be part of the immensely talented blogging team for Smart magazine, over at www.yorkblog.com/smart.

On the Smart blog, you’ll read about more than just my immensely-adorable-but-occasionally-poorly-behaved kids and the funny stuff they say. You’ll get movie reviews, awesome craft projects, healthy-eating tips, and general nuttiness from social media guru Buffy Andrews.

You’ll also get cool hands-on stuff to print out for your kids, like this Halloween coloring page.

So here’s what it boils down to: You’ll still get to share in The Life and Trials of The Gulli Family. But you’ll also get to read other stuff you just might like, too.

Thanks for being a part of Because I’m the Mommy. And please follow me to the Smart blog!

Posted in Just life | Leave a comment

Peeing outside, and other things I’m jealous of

Posted on September 20, 2011 by Amy Gulli

Noah's 'I'm innocent' smile

For a while, I thought I had the only boy in the world who wouldn’t pee outside.

Noah’s been doing a great job potty-training. He’s in underwear all day now, with pull-ups at night (which, of course, must also have pictures of Lightning McQueen on them).

But since he’s such a short stuff, his bladder’s really small, too.

Which means he pees every. 13. minutes.
Continue reading →

Posted in Cute kid stories, Just life, Noah stories, Potty-training | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

I’m so creepy — oh, so creepy

Posted on September 6, 2011 by Amy Gulli

As promised, I’ve got some potty-training stories to share. Including this one about how much I feel like a pedophile lately.

What's that in your purse, ma'am? Oh, it's a little boy's underwear. Oh, that's creepy as hell.

Know why? Because I walk around with little-boy underwear in my purse.

I’ve dropped them on the floor of Giant while pulling out my wallet. I’ve pulled them out and held them up while in line at Target because I couldn’t find my bleeping wallet in my purse (it was, of course, underneath Samantha’s extra pair of socks).

The difficult part is that I have to carry them with me. He’s doing a great job using the potty (WAY better than Sam did when she was his age), but he’s going to have accidents until he learns to completely control that thing.

(As a side note, he quickly figured out how to pee his pants to punish other people for not giving him what he wants. This makes me so angry that I’m nearly certifiable. That’s another post that’s on its way.)

Anyway, walking around with kid underwear in your purse is so weird that even Noah knows it’s wrong.

We were in the grocery store a week or so ago, and he was sitting in the cart with my purse beside him. He started digging through it, looking for my cellphone so he could waste my battery. And he came across a pair of Mater underwear.

Noah (holding up the undies in front of his face): Mom, is dis my underwear?

Me (trying to be matter-of-fact in the make-up aisle): Yup.

Noah (in a disappointed tone, shaking his head): Ohhhhh, Mom. Dat’s not right.

I think I just sank into the “creepy” category. The one that includes clowns. And those weird-ass Boohbah toys.

 

Posted in Noah stories, Potty-training | Leave a comment

First day of 3rd grade

Posted on August 30, 2011 by Amy Gulli

My baby started third grade yesterday.

God! I remember my first day of third grade (although I’ll admit that it seems like forever ago).

Here she is:

All dolled up -- and sassy!

She picked the dress at Target a week or so ago. She tried on another dress, too — all by herself in the fitting room, which was a first — and then asked Noah and me to vote for our favorite.

Noah instantly said, “Da heart one. I love it.”

Done. I didn’t even get to vote. If Noah liked it, Sam was wearing it.

How did your kids pick their first-day-of-school outfits?

Posted in Just life, Sam stories, School | Tagged , | Leave a comment

Sweet, sweet time off

Posted on August 29, 2011 by Amy Gulli

Wanna know why you haven’t heard from me?

Because I was napping. And watching TV. And petting the dog. And petting the cat. And lounging in my pajamas. And spending time in the bathroom all by myself.

I, dear folks, had 10 days off.

In a row.

And like a horrible, horrible mother, I took my kids to day care most of those days so that I could do something I haven’t done in a long time.

I relaxed.

You should try it some time. It’s highly underrated.

However, as we know, all good things must come to an end. So I am back to my crazy, life-in-the-fast-lane routine — which includes keeping y’all up to date on my insanity.

Get ready for some potty-training stories in the days to come!

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Channelling Jim Carrey

Posted on August 8, 2011 by Amy Gulli

Who taught my 3-year-old how to talk out his butt?

I’m not being facetious here or using a derogatory expression. I mean he figured out how to make it look like his butt is talking.

While running around the house butt-naked recently, he suddenly ran into the kitchen, bent over until his forehead touched his chubby ankles, grabbed his sweet hiney cheeks, pulled them apart and said in a silly voice:

“Hi Mom. What are you doing? Look at my buuuuuuuuutt!”
And then ran from the room, giggling like a monkey.

I swear to God he’s never seen a Jim Carrey movie. Maybe he’s a comedic genius in the making?

Jim Carrey talking out his butt
(It looked just like this. Minus Tone Loc. And with a naked toddler.)

Posted in Cute kid stories, Noah stories | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Dear World

Posted on July 20, 2011 by Amy Gulli

Dear World,

Please stop so I can get off for a while.

Not forever. Just for a little bit. Like, maybe somewhere between 20 minutes and 60 days.

Thanks,
Amy

Posted in Just life | Leave a comment

I heart Dean Koontz

Posted on July 18, 2011 by Amy Gulli

koontzcover.jpegI borrowed a copy of Dean Koontz’s new book, “What the Night Knows,” when the kids and I went to the library last week.

And I’m addicted. It’s scaring the pants off me. I can’t put it down.

I’ve even been staying up late reading, which is something I’ve done very little of since I had kids. Don’t get me wrong — I’ve stayed up late reading, but that was usually insomnia-induced, not because a book had me enthralled.

Reading a grown-up book all alone — with no SpongeBob on in the background and minimal chance of a short person interrupting me to change his diaper or get him a snack or fix the ramp for his toy cars or look at his dirty knee — is one of those things that make me feel like a regular human.

Not a mommy, not a wife, not an employee, not a boss. Just me. Absorbed in another world.

What’s the best book you’ve read lately? What kinds of things do you do just for yourself?

Posted in Just life, Just random | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

The Redneck Water Slide

Posted on July 11, 2011 by Amy Gulli

Here’s what my kids did this weekend:
waterslide.jpg
Yup, that’s a hose squirting water down our regular slide into a plastic swimming pool from Walmart, then a sump pump (hey — we finally found a use for that thing!) beneath the slide in the pool pumping the water out and back into the hose.

My husband calls it The Redneck Water Slide. I called it Magic, since it entertained the kids for hours and hours and hours.

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-HAW!

P.S. The sucky part? I had to work. Both Saturday (day shift) and Sunday (afternoon/evening shift). Blech.

Posted in Cute kid stories, Noah stories, Sam stories | Leave a comment

Camping out — NOT

Posted on July 5, 2011 by Amy Gulli

We set up a ginormous tent (that we had completely forgotten we owned) in our backyard this weekend for our first-ever Gulli family camp-out.

I live along a creek that runs out of state gamelands, so we had a beautiful setting. Water flowed over the rock dam that some neighbors built. We roasted jumbo marshmallows over a fire set right at the water’s edge. We read library books by flashlight. We played Connect Four (which is quite a feat when you have a 3-year-old “helping” you).

The kiddos even went to sleep easily. Noah put his two fingers into his mouth, sucked on them about four times and started snoring. Samantha made shadow puppets for another 10 minutes or so, then turned off the flashlight, closed her eyes and zonked out.

It was glorious.

I lay there, looking at the stars through the mesh of one window, then dozed off to the sound of gurgling water.

And then Sam cried.

Continue reading →

Posted in Cute kid stories, Just life, Sam stories | Tagged , , , , , | 2 Comments