As I was taking Sam to preschool today, she pitched a fit.
Sam (whining -- see previous post on Sam's whining): "Why do I have to go see my friends?"
Me: "Because I have to go to work in a little while."
Sam: "Mommy, PLEASE don't go to work."
I had only one day off this weekend, which happens occasionally. To make up for it, I've got a three-day weekend coming up. But that means little to Sam today, or tomorrow, or the next day, because all she knows is she wants to see me and I'm not there.
I did the stay-at-home mom thing for about eight months after Sam was born. I royally sucked at it. I couldn't handle the loneliness, the lack of a schedule imposed by outside forces and the neverending piles of laundry and dishes that I abhorred.
But after two years of working full time, I'm still suffering from near-constant guilt. Is it hurting her that I'm not with her more often? What will she remember about me when she thinks back to this time in her life? Am I skipping out on too many mommy duties too often -- like playing, teaching, encouraging, cuddling, loving?
If you're a working mom, what do you find hardest about it? Do you find yourself overcompensating when you do spend time with your kids? How do you deal with your feelings of guilt?
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