Within three days, I've gone from relief to frustration with Sam and school.
The relief: She's staying in morning kindergarten (insert mental picture of me dancing here -- or don't, if you're trying to eat right now).
The frustration: Sam had another "yellow" day yesterday.
To help parents keep track of how their kids are behaving in school, Sam's teacher keeps a calendar in their folders that go back and forth between school and home everyday. At the end of each school day, the kids have to color that day's calendar square either green, yellow or red.
Green means they had a great day.
Yellow means they had trouble listening or got into trouble in some other way.
Red means they had an atrocious day marked by major problems.
Tuesday was Sam's second yellow day. On her first yellow day, she was pretending to punch somebody, and she didn't stop when the teacher told her to. (Sam's explanation for this, by the way: "The teacher just didn't talk loud enough, so I just didn't hear her, Mom!")
Yesterday, she shoved a boy in line in front of her. To be sure I wasn't jumping to conclusions, I talked through the situation with her: No, he wasn't being mean or teasing her. No, she didn't use her words to ask him to move.
Me: "So why did you shove him?"
Sam: "Because he was in my way."
Me: "But we've talked so much about using your words and not pushing or shoving or biting other people, right?"
Sam: "Right."
Me: "So what should you have done? What should you have said?"
Sam: "I should've said 'excuse me.'"
Me: "That's right. Why didn't you say that?"
Sam: "Because I just couldn't remember the words right then."
Me (not buying this AT ALL): "You couldn't remember the words 'excuse me'?"
Sam: "No, Mom. I just couldn't remember the words to say, so I pushed him."
The kicker is that I had just given her a reward Monday night for having so many green days in a row. It was her own copy of "The Monster at the End of this Book," which stars lovable, furry old Grover and is her absolute favorite book to read with Grammy at Grammy's house.
I know this could be much worse. I know she could have come home with 12 red days by now.
I was the type of kid who felt sick to my stomach when other kids misbehaved, so I tried very, very hard to do everything right (go ahead, toss the "goody two-shoes" remarks at me; I got used to that about 25 years ago =). Sam, however, is the type of kid who has to test her boundaries. I'm pretty sure these are her father's genes at work here.
Thoughts? Her teacher suggested we continue to talk every night about how her day was and reinforce how proud we are when she has green days, etc., which of course we'll do. But with my lovable, furry bundle of energy, I'm not sure that'll be enough.
Unless there's something you want to tell me about me not being Sam's real father the genes are more likely yours...love you
I LOVE The Monster At the End of This Book! It's my favorite kid's story EVER! Sam has good taste! =)
I'll admit, I think the YDR and it's writing staff are atrocious.
But you and this blog are one bright spot. Funny, open, and "every-day" issues are what keep me coming back to reading this. And I don't have kids, either, just a GF with a 4 year-old who acts like Sam.