February 29, 2008

Big Kid beds


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By NANCY POSTER for Smart

It’s the middle of the night.

Thud!

Wahh!

Wailing from your toddler accompanies you down the hall to his bedroom, where he’s out of the crib and on the floor.

While your nerves are probably frayed by the experience -- and your child is startled but still in one piece -- the rude awakening is likely a sign: It’s time for a big kid bed.

That’s the advice Dr. Sean Campbell of Pediatric Care of York gives his patients. It’s also what happened in his own life.

Campbell, the parent of two daughters, recalled hearing that bump when one of his girls was a toddler. The second time it happened, he knew it was time to make the transition.

Most kids are out of their cribs by age 3, he said.

But if your child is in a crib and hasn’t lifted that little leg up over the side to make his escape, don’t fret. Get your money’s worth out of that crib, Campbell said.

Keep your child in the crib until you’re confident he won’t be escaping from his big bed. After all, the parent has more control when the little one is in the confines of a crib.

Some children like their cribs and consider it to be their “turf.” And children between 2 and 4 “are kind of rigid,” he said. They like things to remain the same.

Here are some ways to handle the move:

• Go slow.

“If you sense your child is one that will get upset, you may want to move the bed into the room with the child,” Campbell said. During that time, get the child excited about his new bed, he said, explaining that the technique is similar to potty training.

• Think small.

As in, how tiny legs will get in and out of the new bed.

It doesn’t matter whether a parent chooses a smaller toddler bed, a twin bed or even a roomy double bed for the big move. “The days of high country beds are gone,” he said, adding parents simply need to think about the logistics of how the child will crawl in and out.

• Stay safe.

If your child tends to be a wiggly sleeper, you might want to consider adding side rails.

February 22, 2008

A hands-off approach to helping wildlife


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By GWEN FARISS NEWMAN for Smart

Along with spring comes fresh green grass and flower buds, the chirps of birds and the birth of babes.

For many of us going about the business of cleaning out sheds and tidying up lawns and gardens, it means we’ll come across tiny little critters -- animals toppled out of nests or perhaps left injured or abandoned.

What to do? Well, first of all, don’t rush to do anything.

Richard M. Nixon County Park Educator Francis Velazquez says that people too often mistakenly believe that animals are in jeopardy merely because of their diminutive size.
If a young bunny is fully furred with eyes open, he is ready to venture on his own. “Their instincts, what they’ve learned from mom and dad, either prepares them or it doesn’t,” Velazquez said. “That’s the way of Mother Nature.”

Observe only

Wildlife rehabilitators say too often we make the mistake of assuming that baby animals need help. Just because we’ve stumbled upon them, doesn’t mean that anything is amiss. Assess the situation, but refrain from intervening. The mother might have left the area simply to find food.
“Owls and hawks have to first find food and be successful at catching it. It can take hours,” said wildlife rehabilitator Mitzi Eaton, who specializes in birds of prey. Eaton, who lives in Lower Windsor Township, takes in 75 to 100 birds a year, 90 percent of them the result of traumatic injuries, and successfully returns one-third to one-half back to the wild.

Other situations that we deem dangerous might be perfectly natural. Baby robins, for instance, learn to fly from off the ground, not their nests. They might be developing their flight muscles the way that nature intended when we see them on the ground.

Do not touch

The sight or scent of a human can be fatal to young wildlife. Animals will sometimes abandon their offspring if they sense a human is close to the nest or near the young. Humans also are at risk of contracting disease or of coming into contact with nesting materials infested with fleas.

Wait and see

Do not intervene until it has become apparent that the young indeed are on their own or in danger. Watch quietly from the sidelines. Minimize the chances that the mother will see anything that appears dangerous or might scare her from the nest. Mothers typically return to a nest at night and humans will seldom see them during the day or while hovering nearby.

Wildlife rehabilitators advise waiting at least 24 hours before intervening. Mothers are keenly aware of human presence and will not knowingly reveal the locations of their young.

Assess the situation

If the animal is hurt, it needs immediate care. If not, you might be able to leave the scene and again watch quietly from a more remote location.

You will want to be able to describe how the animal looks, acts and the conditions in which it was found.

Call the pros

In Pennsylvania, it is unlawful for anyone to try to rescue injured or abandoned wildlife unless they are a licensed rehabilitator. This person will be your most valuable resource for protecting a vulnerable bird, mammal or reptile.

Check our “Other local resources” box for contact information for the Pennsylvania Game Commission, or contact your local police department, animal control facility or veterinarian. Penalties for “possession of wildlife” vary by state and by species.

Deliver with care

Wildlife rehabilitators are volunteers who dedicate their time and expertise. They are unpaid and rely on donations of food and other supplies. To take on an injured or abandoned animal, they do ask that those rescuing the animals transport the animals. The rehabilitators will be able to advise and make recommendations for the animal’s safe delivery.

Road to recovery

Babies who are dehydrated or cold will be unable to digest food. Trying to feed them can kill. A wildlife rehabilitator will stabilize the animal prior to feeding and will know what foods work best for individual breeds. Once warm and hydrated, babies must be fed consistently, usually around the clock as frequently as every other hour. Animals may be tended for weeks or even months before they recover and recuperate.

Bye, bye birdie

Young, abandoned animals have a high survival rate when quickly brought in for care. Success inevitably will vary based on age, overall health, any injuries and access to needed resources. The goal for all recoveries is to successfully treat the animal and return it to the wild.

Become a resource

Help inform those with big hearts that their assistance might be less in the form of nursing or nurturing a small critter back to health and more in the form of contacting correct people.

Spring peak

Spring is the peak season for wildlife rehabilitators tending to orphaned or injured animals.
Barbara Gregory of Newberry Township specializes in the care of small mammals, such as squirrels and rabbits, as well as deer, turtles, beavers and river otters. She cares for as many as 300 to 400 animals in a year and will sometimes receive as many as 25 calls in a day during the spring peak.

Many of her rescues involve animals injured by domestic pets. She advises keeping a close watch on cats, in particular, whose sharp teeth can easily puncture organs and cause deadly harm.

“I’ve read accounts where bunnies have had a cardiac arrest in someone’s hands, because it was scared to death,” Velazquez said.

Locally licensed rehabilitators

• Barbara Gregory (small mammals) 938-4040
• Mitzi Eaton (birds of prey) 757-4420
• Teresa Deckard (songbirds) 843-4914
Other local resources
• Pennsylvania Game Commission 787-4250 (state headquarters);
(610) 926-3136 (Southeast Region)
• Bird Refuge of York County, 843-4914
• Richard M. Nixon County Park, 428-1961


February 21, 2008

Rainy day fun

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CHRISTOPHER GLASS for Smart

Laci Miller, 2, and mom, Danielle Miller, of Springettsbury Township plan for puddle jumping on a recent rainy day.

By NANCY POSTER for Smart

April showers might bring May flowers, but it also brings bored, restless kids and irritated parents.

So, short of turning on the TV, what can parents do to bust the boredom on a cold rainy day?

Give these activities a try.

1. Make and fly paper airplanes. Click here
for step-by-step instructions and here for decals to personalize your aircraft.

2. Create a rainy day sandbox. Fill a large plastic bin with dry pasta, dry beans or rice. Then give the kids measuring cups, spoons or sand toys for digging.

3. Create your own word search puzzles, or click here for puzzles we created.

4. Make a book of favorites, such as favorite toys, animals, bugs, flowers or foods. Look through old magazines, cards or surf the Web for images to glue onto the pages.

5. Line up empty plastic soda bottles, get a rubber ball and bowl.

6. Go to a local appliance store and ask for a large refrigerator box. Break out the scissors, glitter, paints, crayons and markers to create a giant fort or spaceship.


7. Have an indoor “snowball” fight using wadded up sheets of newspaper. Then, see who can gather the most balls into a bag for recycling.

8. Make a “Book About Me” using photos and scrapbooking supplies. Some topics could include: height, hobbies, friends, sports, loves, dislikes. Some of your child’s answers might surprise you and lead to a great conversation.

9. Have a scavenger hunt. Make a list of things for children to find, such as loose change, a paper clip, a rubber band or a colored marker. Throw in some that require some thought, such as “something with teeth but not a mouth” (a comb). Set the timer and go.

10. Finger paint with chocolate pudding on a paper plate, then lick the plate clean.

11. Raid the house for dress up stuff: a scarf to turn into a boa, a colander for a hat, high heels or ties. Put them in a laundry basket, turn on some music and ask the kids to put on a fashion show.

12. Build tents out of blankets and pretend you’re camping. For an added touch, make s’mores in the microwave.

13. Make musical instruments: a paper plate can become a tambourine, plastic bottles filled with beans make perfect shakers and used paper towel rolls can make a horn. Have a rainy day parade.

Sources include: www.redshift.com and
http://utut.essortmentcom

Spring Chicken

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By BETH BENCE REINKE for Smart


Lori Broberg of New Freedom loves cooking with chicken because it’s quick, versatile and low in fat.

As chef for Shannon’s Serendipity Catering, Broberg prepares chicken dishes year-round. Winter recipes are usually heavier and use some kind of sauce on the chicken, she said. But with warmer weather around the corner, now is the time to go lighter.

“A lot of spring chicken recipes are marinated and put on the grill or sautéed,” she said. Light fruit sauces can dress up chicken entrees, too.

There are a myriad of ways to prepare chicken, such as broasted, steamed, baked, grilled or stir-fried. Since poultry meshes well with a lot of flavors, the recipe combinations are endless. “Chicken takes well to pretty much everything - spices, oils, marinades,” Broberg said.
Stock up on chicken next time you're at the supermarket. That way, if your creativity has flown the coop by dinnertime, you can whip up one of these simple recipes.


Teriyaki Chicken Kabobs

6 (12-inch) wooden skewers
1½ pounds chicken tenderloin, cut into 1½ inch pieces
3 assorted bell peppers, cut into 1-inch pieces
2 small red onions, quartered
½ fresh pineapple, cut into 1-inch pieces
For the marinade
¼ cup soy sauce
¼ cup teriyaki sauce
¼ cup firmly packed light brown sugar
2 tablespoons dark sesame oil
1 tablespoon fresh minced garlic
1 tablespoon fresh grated ginger
¼ cup chopped green onions

Whisk all marinade ingredients together and set aside.

To assemble kabobs: Soak wooden skewers in water for 30 minutes to prevent burning. Thread chicken, peppers, onion and pineapple alternately onto skewers. Place kabobs into a rectangular baking pan and pour marinade over them. Refrigerate overnight.

Discard marinade and grill kabobs with lid closed over medium heat for 8-10 minutes on each side or until done.

Makes 6 servings.

Source: Chef Lori Broberg

Spicy Chicken Corn Skillet

1 pound boneless, skinless chicken breasts cut into thin strips
2 tablespoons olive oil
1 medium onion, chopped
1 medium green pepper, chopped
1 (14.5-ounce) can stewed tomatoes, cut up
1 cup frozen corn, thawed
1 cup cooked rice
For the seasoning
½ teaspoon salt
½ teaspoon dried oregano
½ teaspoon paprika
¼ teaspoon pepper
1/8 teaspoon cayenne pepper

In large skillet, stir-fry chicken in 1 tablespoon oil until no longer pink. Remove and set aside. In same skillet, sauté onion and green pepper in 1 tablespoon oil until tender. Stir in tomatoes, corn and seasonings. Bring to a boil. Stir in chicken and rice. Reduce heat, cover and cook until heated through.

Makes 4 servings.

Source: AllRecipes.com

Apricot Chicken

4 (4-ounce) boneless, skinless chicken breast halves
2 tablespoons butter
1 (15-ounce) can apricot halves
1 tablespoon cornstarch
¼ cup apricot preserves
2 tablespoons white wine vinegar

In a large skillet, cook chicken in butter over medium heat for 5 minutes, turning occasionally. Cover and cook 5 minutes longer or until juices run clear. Remove and keep warm. Drain apricots, reserving juice. Cut apricots into ½-inch slices and set aside. In a small bowl, combine cornstarch and reserved juice until smooth.

Stir in preserves and vinegar until combined and pour into skillet. Bring to a boil over medium heat. Cook and stir for 1-2 minutes or until thickened. Add apricots and chicken and heat through.

Makes 4 servings.

Source: Allrecipes.com

February 8, 2008

SMART IDEAS: Readers' parenting advice

I feel the worst advice any new mother should receive is how someone else tells you to raise and take care of your newborn child.


I had five children, and the best advice I was told and will also give is, your children watch how you conduct yourself and listen to what you say - and will do the same. Teach them very early in life and bring them up in God’s way about trust, love, hope and to believe in themselves. Be around good people and belive in God, and good values, and they will do well in life. My children did, and I’m very proud of them.
- Edith Lo Bianco, Dallastown


I was a missionary mom with two young children, ages 1 and 3, living in a doll-sized house in a small village in Thailand. No TV. No babysitters or family to provide the occasional break. I’d stopped playing the guitar because the boys would be climbing all over me to get at it. I’d stopped being artistic because there was no uninterrupted time or space to do art. I had begun to see my kids as obstacles to all my creative impulses.


When I discovered an article (in the early 1980s) about how my kids could be opportunities instead of obstacles I began to change my way of thinking. We could do art together. We could explore the world around us and look for details and colors and shapes and sizes and textures and variety. We could create in the kitchen, going first to the market to discover some new and interesting ingredients.


I didn’t have a lot of time to read my books but instead I read a lot to the kids, and we were always on the prowl for new books. These changes became my new habits, and it was natural to continue this pattern with the next two that came along in the following years.
- Holly Niphakis, Dallastown


“The best advice I was given was actually a poem in a cross-stitch way back when my oldest was born. It goes like this:


‘Cleaning and scrubbing can wait for tomorrow,
For babies grow up, I’ve learned, to my sorrow.
So quiet down, cobwebs. Dust, go to sleep.
I’m rocking my baby, and babies don’t keep.’
- Ruth Hulburt, Hamilton


Absolutely the best advice, in my opinion!

Worst advice, . . . picking the baby up too much will spoil him. Crazy.
- Tracy Hollman, Manchester Township


• Children must be introduced to education (learning and reality) at an early age and understand they must grow up to be responsible adults, and understand morality and ethics.

• Education and growing up do not occur automatically with age; children must be taught, and learning should continue their entire life.

• Pampering, over indulgence and lack of discipline will not produce adults.

The rules above are the result of my 80 years, that included being a child of my parents, being a parent, cooperation with my children’s teachers, officer in Parent Teacher organizations at local and county levels, graduate of Johns Hopkins, substitute teacher in a junior high school, teaching classes at Delaware County Community College, and observation of our four children, seven grandchildren and four great grandchildren.
- Edwin T. Calvert, East Berlin


In my experience, a good parent corrects without criticizing, encourages without harping, supports but never threatens or rejects, helps when help is needed (without bankrupting themselves in terms of time, money or emotional resources!), never raises their voice or their hand in violence, lets loose without letting go, never fails to say and show love daily, prays unceasingly, exposes children to enriching new experiences, and then steps back to watch as each child finds or chooses his or her own path in life. The parent never holds the child too tightly, as this suffocates the child from finding her or his own passions and loves in life. Children are SUPPOSED to grow up, leave home, and contribute to the world on their own terms. They are not a substitute to fulfill the parents’ own emotional needs.
- Robert L. Anderson, York


Quiet time, quality time

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PAUL KUEHNEL for Smart

Noah Boin, 3, left, works by himself while Angie Boin works with her oldest son, Aaron, 7, while home-schooling at their Fawn Township home.


By BETH BENCE REINKE for Smart


Marylee Hall’s New Freedom home is no stranger to noise -- after all, she has a toddler and a newborn. But, thanks to careful preparation and planning, the Hall household does quiet down for a few hours each day.

“The baby sleeps a lot, so we are able to coordinate naps at the same time,” Hall said. Using a routine before nap time has helped Hall’s 1-year-old daughter make a smooth transition from playing to resting.


“After lunch, we play in her room with the door closed with soft music on for about a half-hour,” Hall said. Then she gives her daughter a pacifier and blanket and puts her in her crib for her usual three-hour nap.


When her boys were younger, Fawn Grove resident Angie Boin also was able to coordinate napping and rest time each day. Now at ages 7, 5 and 3, the boys rarely nap, but they still rest several times a week and on Sundays.


“We come home from church, then we have lunch, then they rest,” Boin said.
She takes a relaxed approach, allowing the boys to do quiet activities while lying or sitting on their beds. As a result, Boin’s youngest son has learned to play quietly by himself while she is home schooling the older boys. “Sometimes, he is knocking over stuff and coloring on the table instead of his book,” she said with a chuckle. “But for the most part, he is good.”


Want some quiet time of your own? Try these mom-tested tips.


• Give this part of the day a special name such as “rest time” or “quiet time.”


• Do quiet time every day, if possible, to keep kids in a routine.


• Put all children in quiet time simultaneously. If you have a baby or toddler who naps, that time is your best bet.


• For children who no longer nap, have them lie quietly on their beds for a designated length of time, like an hour. Sometimes they might even fall asleep!


• For older children who have trouble being totally unoccupied for an hour, allow one of these quiet activities during rest time: reading or looking at books silently, listening to books on tape or CDs with headphones, putting jigsaw puzzles together, coloring or drawing.

Scary diseases often aren't as bad as they sound

By GWEN FARISS NEWMAN for Smart

Cradle cap. Cat scratch fever. Slapped cheek.

Scary names for childhood diseases that often aren’t nearly as serious as they sound. Thank goodness.

Though just the names are enough to make most parents shiver, most of these illnesses are really relatively harmless and short term.

Cat scratch fever

Cat scratch fever is indeed caused by being scratched, bitten or even licked by a cat or kitten. Symptoms don’t appear for about a week, are usually mild, typically don’t require treatment and are not spread from person to person. The disease is characterized by a brownish-red bump or sore where the cat made contact with the child. Sometimes symptoms include swollen glands, tiredness, loss of appetite, a rash or sore throat.

Pink eye


Pink eye is characterized by red eyes and might be caused by a virus, a bacterial infection (also contagious), allergies, a plugged tear duct or a foreign body stuck under the eyelid. Most are relieved by warm compresses, saline eye drops and antibiotics.


Cradle cap

Cradle cap is crusty skin on your baby’s scalp. Not so cosmetically appealing, but a child is otherwise healthy aside from patchy scales and redness on the scalp. The scales might appear cracked, greasy or even weeping.

This is most common in the first three months of a baby’s life and atypical after a child’s first birthday, though parents might see it again in the life of a teen when they again undergo more rapid growth. It is not contagious. Treatment is essentially gentle shampoos and perhaps a moisturizing oil treatment.

Slapped cheek

Slapped cheek is a virus characterized by a bright red or lace-like rash on the face. It is more common in children than adults and can be spread by coughs and sneezes. The rash will last several days, and the virus is no longer contagious once the rash appears. Other symptoms might include joint pain and swelling and sometimes headache. Not all will get a rash or feel sick.

Slapped cheek, medically known as erythema infectiosum, was also dubbed fifth disease because at one time it was one of the most five common childhood diseases causing rashes. (Others are measles, scarlet fever, rubella and roseola.) It is caused by human parvovirus B19. Pregnant women who are exposed to it should contact their doctors, as it does pose risks to fetuses.

Nits and lice


That little saying that we’re “nit-picking,” well, that came from an all-too-common childhood condition known as lice. Very misunderstood, the infestation has nothing to do with personal or home hygiene and is common in schools and day care centers. Lice are passed from person to person by direct contact, as well as through the exchange of brushes, combs and hats.


Treatment is a medicated shampoo or rinse. Symptoms are itching, as well as the presence of lice and eggs. Nits are tiny white shells glued to the hair shaft near the skin. Those closest to the scalp might have live eggs. Others may be empty.

Nits, though sometimes hard to distinguish from dandruff, are not easily removed from the head. Some schools have a “no nit” policy to decrease spread of lice.

Hand, foot and mouth disease


Another virus, this causes blisters in the mouth in most of those infected, as well as rashes on the hands, feet and buttocks in about two-thirds of those affected. Other symptoms are crankiness, a sore throat, loss of appetite and fever. The virus will run its course in about one week.

When to call the doctor

• High fever or any fever in an infant younger than 4 weeks
• Chills that make the child shake all over
• Trouble breathing or when a child is working hard to breathe
• Loss of consciousness
• Extreme sleepiness or unexplained lethargy
• Sudden weakness or paralysis of any part of the body
• Seizures or uncontrollable shaking of an arm or leg
• Pain, heaviness or stuffiness around the nose, eyes or forehead
• Nasal fluid that is discolored, bad-smelling or bloody
• Sudden hearing loss
• Sudden decrease in vision
• Eyes that are red, swollen and watery, with or without blurred vision.
• Severe or prolonged episode of diarrhea, vomiting or severe abdominal pain or if the diarrhea stools contain blood.
• Dehydration. Signs include dry lips and tongue, skin that is pale and dry, sunken eyes, listlessness or decreased activity, and decreased urination.


Source: <http://www.prairiepublic.org/features/healthworks/kids/call.htm>


Add this to the shopping cart

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By NICKI LEFEVER for Smart

After having 10 babies, Susan Wood learned what works and what doesn’t. She knows new moms should walk past the baby oil and buy a big tube of Balmex. They should register for the swing and skip the bouncy seat.

The York New Salem mom took a trip down the baby aisle at Target in West Manchester Township and shared what her shopping list would be if she were to go for No. 11.

It’s been five years since her youngest, Anthony, was born and a few things have changed, improved or become obsolete, but she has some good advice.

“You really have too many choices when you are a new parent,” Wood said. “I can see getting frustrated looking at it all.”

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The shopping list
Luvs diapers
$6.89 for 30 count
“They’re less expensive than most brands and they don’t leak.”


Swing
$100 to $140
“We went through four. They’re so soothing, and you can’t hold the baby all the time.”

A wooden crib
$100 or more
“A wooden crib is better than an aluminum crib. If the baby rolls onto the rail of a cold aluminum rail in the middle of the night, it’s going to wake them up.”

High chair
$29.99 to $169.99
“Get an adjustable one. They want to be at table level so they can see what’s going on. It doesn’t need wheels.”

Changing table
$79.99 to $129.99
“It’s safer than changing them on the bed, especially if you have other kids who like to jump on the bed. It’s nice to have the storage, too.”

Rocking chair
$50 or more
“Definitely have to have it.”

Baby gym mat
$18 to $25
“They are so fun. You can get on the floor with them and play.”

Sling carrier
$20 to $30
“If they’re close and comfy, they are happy and you can do stuff around the house.”

Car shade
$5.99

Car seat
$39.99 to $199.99
“The pop out carriers are nice. They might be asleep and you can carry them inside and set it on the table to feed them. The ones with extra bases are nice if you and your husband each have a car.”

Playpen/play yard
$39.99 to $129.99
“It’s their area and their space.”

Stroller
$10.99 to $199.99
“I think the ones with the infant seat attached are awkward.”

Plastic bathtub
$9.49 to $28.49

Johnson’s/Target Bed Time Bath
$5.84/$2.89 for 28 ounces

Baby Orajel
$4.44 for .18 ounce tube
“They make a funny face when you use it, but in 60 seconds they are like, ‘Ahhh, my mouth doesn’t hurt anymore.’ ”

Balmex
$3.99 for 4 ounces
“That is kind of like a survival cream. I still use it for my kids.”

Nursing pads
$6.94 for 60 count
“You need many boxes, especially if you go out to an emotional movie. You need it!”

Playtex VentAire bottles
$10.99 for a three pack of 4-ounce bottles or 8-ounce bottles
“The smaller ones are good because babies don’t eat a lot when they are young. You should have eight to 10 bottles.”

Pacifier
99 cents to $2.99
“It’s a lifesaver if you aren’t nursing.”

Bottle brush
$1.99
“The formula sticks to the side of the bottle and rinsing it out or soaking it doesn’t always work.”

Night and day bottle warmer
$12.99 to $29.99
“It’s nice if you have to feed at night and you don’t feel like going downstairs to get it. That’s nice.”

Terry cloth bibs
$5.99 for a five-pack
“You need to save their clothes from all the formula they burp up. They go through five or six a day.”

Nasal aspirator
$2
“It’s good because they can’t blow their nose.”

An ear thermometer
$39.99
“It’s less irritating than a mouth thermometer. It takes one second.”

Night lights
$5.99 for two.

Crib mobile
About $20
“It stimulates the kids, but it also makes things easier for you.”

Baby monitor
$18.99 to $162.99
“We just had a regular Fisher-Price one, but if your child has a medical problem, the video monitor would be good.”

Blankets
About $9.99
“They’ll get attached to one blanket, and it’s probably the one you like and give them the most.”

Baby detergent (Dreft)
$14.86 for 200 ounces
“It isn’t too harsh, and it prevents rashes.”

Infants’ Mylicon
About $14 for 1 fluid ounce
“It saves a lot of trips to the doctor. It’s anti-gas drops.”

Humidifier
$29.99 to $169.99
“You can’t give them medicine for a cold, so that or vapor rub is good.”



Less useful

Activity saucers
$79.99
“My kids didn’t like being stationary, and I thought it put a lot of stress on their back.”

Bouncy seats
$24.99 to $169.99
“We had one but never bothered to use it.”

Diaper Genie
$19.99 to $21.99
“You don’t need that, just take out the trash. You just tend to collect more diapers with that thing.”

Baby oil
$3.99
“We never needed to use that.”

Stuffed animals
$1 to $20
“One is OK, but not too many. They say you are supposed to wash them once a week. For me, it was either the sheets or the stuffed animals.”

Teaching Black History

Test your knowledge

1. In York, a small park off College Avenue is named in memory of Helen Thackston. Why?
A. She gave the city the land.
B. Her home was on the site of the park.
C. She helped care for and educate inner-city children all her life.
D. She taught black children at a school once on the site.

2. Pennsylvania was the first state in the union to pass a law calling for the gradual abolition of slavery. When was it passed?
A. 1825
B. 1800
C. 1780
D. 1857

3. In the first half of the 20th century, this black physician was considered the “mayor” of the black community. What was his name?
A. Aquilla Howard
B. George Bowles
C. James Smallwood
D. Squire Braxton

4. Who was Crispus Attucks?
A. A black leader in York.
B. A civil rights activist.
C. An 18th-century man living in Boston.
D. A professional football player.

5. Maulana Karenga, the founder of Kwanzaa, was a graduate of which high school?
A. Central York High School
B. William Penn Senior High School
C. Spring Grove Area Senior High School
D. Hanover Senior High School

Source: “Almost Forgotten” by James McClure

Answers: 1. C. After the Crispus Attucks Community Center was established in 1931, Helen Thackston started its preschool program and served as its director until 1964. She also headed the young people’s choir at her church and was superintendent of its Sunday school for the primary grades. For the first 15 years, she worked without pay. Her care for the children at Crispus Attucks included meeting the children at Penn Park and walking them to and from Crispus Attucks. She died in 1969, and the park was named for her in 1972.

2. C. In 1780, a measure was passed for gradual abolition of slavery. Pennsylvania was the first state of the union to pass an abolition law.

3. B. For much of the time he was in practice, Dr. George Bowles was York’s only black doctor.

4. C. Before the outbreak of the Revolutionary War, Crispus Attucks was among those protesting the tea tax. British soldiers killed him. Crispus Attucks, son of an African man, became the first to die for America’s freedom. The Crispus Attucks Community Center in York bears his name.

5. B. Karenga was known as Ron Everett when he graduated from William Penn Senior High School in 1958. The seven-day celebration of black cultural unity begins on Dec. 26. The first Kwanzaa was in 1966.

Spacing Your Babies

By MELISSA NANN BURKE
For Smart

The Cuculises figured they’d space their kids close together: They could be friends and have ready playmates.

“In hindsight, I think they fight more,” said mom Kim Cuculis, 45, of Springfield Township. Her children are now 6, 8, 11, 16 and 18.

Sibling personalities, a mother’s health, family finances, careers and other variables may all play a role when parents decide to expand their family.

While there might be no ideal spacing of children, a few basic factors can affect whether parents want to have another child sooner or later.

Doctors generally recommend six months at minimum between pregnancies because of the time it takes for the body to replenish its stores of iron and calcium, as well as strength and emotional well-being, said Dr. Julie Drolet, an obstetrician and gynecologist at WomanCare Obstetrics & Gynecology in Springettsbury Township.

An exception is a woman whose last pregnancy was by Caesarean section. Those mothers need more time to heal, Drolet said.

“If a woman tries to deliver within 18 months of a previous Caesarean section, her risk of uterine rupture is increased,” she said.

Financial and work issues, and emotional stability also should concern parents. The amount of stress a mother is feeling will affect her children, said Allen R. Miller, a clinical psychologist at WellSpan Behavioral Health.

Siblings essentially compete for limited resources: parents’ money, time and attention.

Close-in-age children must divide those resources more sharply, and children can become frustrated without the attention they require and crave.

“At different points, children have different needs,” Sam Pisano, a professional counselor who directs the Behavioral Health Department at Memorial Hospital. “In the first year of a child’s life, the amount of attention they require is high. If you have two children under 2 or 3, you’re dividing that attention up.”

Not to mention the exhaustion and emotional toll of round-the-clock care. Parents might feel they’re missing the chance to bond fully with the child or enjoy each child as an individual.
Of course, some parents enlist the help of grandparents and friends - especially in the case of multiple births, Pisano said.

On the plus side, close-in-age siblings are more likely to share interests and enjoy age-appropriate activities together, making juggling family schedules easier.

They also may be closer companions. But even Pisano’s first two children — spaced four years apart — competed at times in their younger years.

“When they’re spaced further apart, there’s less of that,” he said. “You don’t have the comparisons, the friends aren’t divided between siblings, and the teachers aren’t saying, ‘How come you aren’t like your brother or sister?’”

While more independent, an older child might have difficulty adjusting to the arrival of a new sibling.

And children of varying ages might not have similar interests because of their different developmental levels.

Cuculis said, “As a family, we really wanted to go out West to the dude ranches and have a vacation out there. But when it would have been good for the older kids, the younger ones weren’t old enough to ride the horses. Same with riding a raft down the Colorado River.”

Of course, not everyone can afford to wait years between childbirths. Maternal age might be a consideration for some mothers, whose risk of fertility problems and delivering children with birth defects increases with their age.

Some research has suggested the ideal spacing between children is four years, Miller said.
That interval gives parents the opportunity to bring the baby into the world, go through infancy, get used to the routine and develop a level of stability before repeating the process.

“Then again, I know people who say two years is the ideal,” Miller said. “The important thing is that they’ve thought about it, and they have a plan.”


When Baby Makes Three

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The Harrises and the Leydigs represent opposite ends of the parenting spectrum.
Amy and Colin Harris of Red Lion are in the baby stage — the restless nights, the busy days, the endless needs voiced as only an infant can, through wordless
communication.

Cynthia and Randy Leydig of York have become a couple again, after their youngest child moved out at age 18. They’re in the empty-nest stage — the restful nights, the busy work days, the endless quiet and clean that comes only when the children have flown the coop.
Countless couples occupy the in-between stage of parenting, not starting out, but not done either.

They have school-age children who require help with homework, rides to and from extracurricular activities, team sports, piano lessons. Their jam-packed schedules leave little time for married couples to swap their Mom and Dad labels for time as a twosome.

Yet, as Jane Kieber can attest, it’s more important than ever for parents to carve out couple time. Kieber works with couples and families as a counselor and parenting educator for Family/Child Resources of York.

All marriages encounter highs and lows. Kieber said one of the most stressful times comes when baby makes three.

Amy and Colin Harris, who had Jackson less than a year ago, would agree.

“We knew there were going to be changes, but we had no idea what they would be until Jackson arrived,” Amy Harris said in an e-mail. “Instead of thinking about our wants and needs, we had to think about Jackson’s. Things cannot be done at a drop of a hat. There is not much time as a couple, and the time we are together we are tired from work and being a parent.”

They snatch time together when Jackson sleeps at night. They cuddle on the couch watching television. Each will endure a sporting event or chick flick if it allows them some couple time. Their favorite family time comes during Jackson’s bath and when they’re getting him ready for bed. “We all laugh as a family and enjoy those little moments,” Amy said.

Couples usually divide and conquer when it comes to shuttling kids here and there or completing the tasks for bedtime. But seeing your partner as a good parent reminds you why you wanted to reproduce with him/her in the first place, Kieber said, so do these things together.

The Harrises’ second wedding anniversary, celebrated recently at Victor’s Italian Restaurant in Spring Garden Township, gave them a rare night out while Nana watched her grandson. It was a time to talk uninterrupted, and linger on events of the day. “We talked about work, friends or current events but, to be honest, we mostly talked about Jackson.”

The Leydigs celebrated their 26th wedding anniversary in December.

Cynthia Leydig said she struggled when her children left home, especially her youngest. She and her husband had to get reacquainted: “You wake up and say, ‘Who are you?’” They had to get accustomed to spending large amounts of time together, in the evening, on the weekends, without children interrupting them at every turn. They had to search for common interests, and they found them in motorcycles and gardening. They started planning trips by bike and gardening together.

Some nights, they enjoy puttering around the local hardware store. One of them will say to the other, “You wanna go walk around Lowe’s?” And off they go.

Cindy Leydig recently advised a friend, whose children are younger and at home: “You still have to make time for your spouse. You can’t put all your time and energy into the kids.”

Reader’s tip: Keep that lovin’ feeling My fiancé (Brian) and I are like peas and carrots, peanut butter and jelly. Sometimes our schedules are busy, but we never forget about each other. As I pack his lunch, I leave little love notes, and he leaves little sticky notes over the mirror professing his love for me. Every day we call one another to ask, “How is your day going?”

When I get home later than him, a glass of wine is waiting for me along with his open arms. Every Thursday night, we make pizza together. We also work in, about every two weeks, to stay in our jammies and we make a bed on the floor and watch movies. We fall asleep every night hand-in-hand.

— Tina Hawkins, York