Today marks the first of several guilt free days of ice cream and popsicle binges, lounging in jammies and hours of mindless internet surfing. What’s the occasion? This morning I traded in my wisdom teeth for four slits in my mouth and swollen lips that rival Angie’s.
It was far from a relaxing experience! To start, I was given a gas mask to “relax” me while several assistants anxiously watched my every move. I’m not sure what they were expecting; making a break for it? My body was completely covered in wires and monitors after all!
Next, the head surgeon arrived and helped to ease the tension in the atmosphere…until he made me a human pin cushion! Due to my “tiny veins” it took not one, nor two but six tries to find an acceptable patch of skin to distribute the anesthesia.
After that, it’s a bit foggy but I awoke an hour or so later with a few bruises on my arm and a mouth full of cotton (literally! In order to stop the bleeding, I had to switch out cotton strips all day).
After another hour or so of sleep at home I reassessed my situation and was shocked to discover my entire face was numb! This became extremely annoying as it required the use of my mother as my personal “napkin wiper” to help out whenever I ate any ice cream.
Currently it is around 8 at night and although I have regained my ability to speak without the use of either a) texting my requests or b) a series of pointless motions and hand gestures; my lips are rapidly increasing in size as are my cheeks.
Therefore, I have decided to title this series of blogs on my recovery as “Diary of a Chipmunk”. Perhaps within a few days I can at least change the name…. maybe Diary of a Blow Fish?!