Think about the last “date” you went on. Where did you go? What did you do? Who was there?
The New York Times published an article last week with the title “The End of Courtship?”, focusing on a handful of 20-something and 30-something women who are experiencing a rapidly changing dating scene.
Potential dates send off a text or tweet asking to “hang out.” A dinner date becomes a drink — if that. Larger groups of friends meet up, and online dating sites and technology at large have created an informal, speed-dating mentality where casual reigns as king.
“Dating culture has evolved to a cycle of text messages, each one requiring the code-breaking skills of a cold war spy to interpret,” Shani Silver, 30, said in the article. “It’s one step below a date, and one step above a high-five.”
I had to laugh. Between my own experiences and stories from friends, Silver hit the nail on the head. When we did decide — collectively, as a generation — that dating wasn’t something we were interested in anymore? We “grab a drink.” We “hang out.” We “meet up.” We avoid the four-letter word (date!) at all costs.
The comments section is — of course — rife with detractors, some of whom argue that if you want more from a potential suitor, demand it. That might be fair. But I found it interesting to hear thoughts from women (and men) on their experiences.
The article might be from the NYT, but it sounds an awful lot like York’s dating scene, too.
– An interesting response from Slate’s Amanda Hess: “Technology Killed Courtship. Good Riddance.”