Image by PhotoXpress user Alexey Arkhipov
I have been experiencing sticker shock lately as I look for ways to pull off a wedding sometime in the near future. I got engaged more than a month ago, and since then it has been an ongoing anxiety attack.
Just ask my co-workers, friends, family and future husband. There have been screams (mostly at the wedding institution and not directed at the above mentioned), tears and feelings of apathy.
And I feel like I have a right to be so screwy lately, because the average wedding costs $25,631, according to Cost of Wedding. Even though this is the average, the website contends that the majority of couples spend between $19,223 and $32,039 for their weddings.
You might have that in your savings account, but I sure don’t! My parents can’t afford to pay for my wedding, and neither can my fiance’s parents. But oh boy, do they have their opinions on what I MUST have, despite it seeming to cost double or triple the average prices.
And whereas a wedding and reception might have been an important moment in the lives of many 20-somethings, there is a clear difference between my generation and my parents’ generation — our earlier debt load.
According to Business Insider, today’s 20-somethings carry an average of $45,000 in debt. A wedding would cost close to half of that. I’m sorry, Mom, but if it is between a wedding and paying off half my debt (with interest, might I add), I go with the pay-off.
I put my basic wedding plans through the wedding cost estimator on Cost of Wedding (without telling specifics) and as I suspected, my wedding would cost more than $24,000. According to the site, the average York, Pa., wedding costs between $19,800 to $33,000, with an average guest list of 127 to 147 people.
The website does make a lot of assumptions, like I will be paying $1,300 for our rings (heck no) and close to $2,000 on flowers (nope.) However, this site does bring to the forefront all the little costs I didn’t think about, like $209 for wedding favors, $58 for my hair and about $800 for paper products (invitations, cards, etc.)
This site doesn’t add to my anxiety but it doesn’t lessen it, either. If anything, it solidifies one sole idea — elopement looks better every day that goes by.
How much did you spend on your wedding? Would you rather pay off your debt, or was it worth it?
There are a lot of complaints in this article, so how about trying a solution-focused approach and offering some suggestions for managing the budget? There are a lot of people in the same situation, and I expect that it would be more helpful to them (and yourself) if you outlined typical plans, budget, and ways to cut costs.
The thing is, I am not sure how to manage it right now, with all the demands/options. Right now I am not sure HOW to cut costs, since this is a totally new experience for me. But when I get more knowledge on the subject, I might write another post.
My husband and I got married about 5 years ago and were able to do it for under $10k with 120 guests. Its all in the decisions you make. A planner/coordinator is your best friend in wedding planning. They know ways to save. Also, ask your other vendors for recommendations. We work with these vendors – we know which ones are awesome.
Good luck with planning!
Thank you, Jess! I was considering a wedding planner. Like you said, they know ways to save so their fees are worth it!
Hey Bethany, I saw your link on facebook and my fiance and I are in very much the same situation. We are planning a wedding for August. Some books I have found helpful include Plan the Perfect Wedding on a Small Budget and Offbeat Bride, I can always get you my copies as I won’t need them much longer. I think it is important to remember the reason for the event in the first place, that is celebrating you and your fiance. Don’t let that take a backseat to all the other nonsense. I know we are saving money by doing all invite stuff online mostly for free or very cheaply. We used a website called Paperless Post for save the dates. Pick a budget and stick with it. Make a list of your priorities and then allocate the money accordingly. Look for venues that are not traditionally used for weddings. Most vendors will work with your budget or you can do a lot of things on your own. Also if you have creative friends, take advantage of them to help with photography, flowers or hair and make-up. I know it can be stressful but don’t let the wedding industry machine make you feel like you can not have a budget friendly wedding that will represent your fiance and yourself. Hope this helps. I know the feeling so let me know if you need any more advice or tidbits.
I’ve been taking wedding photos for a long time. This is what I’ve seen. Brides are beautiful. They spend so much money on their gown, hair, make-up, nails and toes. And they should. Now the things they really don’t need. Limos, party favors on every table, isle runners in church, cameras at every table for the reception, (Every friend or relative brings a camera) ice sculptures, and the list can go on. The couple will spend money on many more items than I have listed. What they tend to forget is, someone that is actually a professional that can take photos of this beautiful day. They get a friend, uncle or whoever they can find, and because they have a camera, think they know how to capture this beautiful day. They don’t. I’ve heard so many sob stories, that the bride has no professional photos of her day. Only a few friends took some photos, without a whole lot of thought. Search around. You don’t have to pay over the top for photographs. Look at the person’s work. Get referances. Set your budget for xxx amount of dollars. Don’t go over that. Please, get someone that acutally knows what their doing.